A grits and corn kind of Asian: How one Thai-American grew to embrace his roots on his nametag

Mike Merritt chuckles that people are often surprised when they meet him in person. It’s not that there’s anything unusual or off-putting about the 41-year-old Texan’s physical features or personality. People just don’t make the name-face connection until their first encounter with him.

That’s because Michael J.S. Merritt is Thai-American. Not white. Not black. Thai, with a regular – bland even – American name.

Born Supamith Boonsalee in 1967 in Thailand, Merritt went by Nam, a common play name, at home. At the age of seven, he came to the United States with his mother, who had been widowed but remarried, and two sisters. They settled in Arlington, Texas, where the family eventually welcomed three new members – twins David and Kris and Janet. They became a sort of new-American Brady Bunch.

Merritt, who was later adopted by his white stepfather, nevertheless says he grew up respecting and cherishing his Thai culture. He says he quickly grew to love his new life in America, too. He started attending a Salvation Army church with his family every week, slipping away from Buddhism. He learned to make friends with non-Asians at school and in the neighborhood.

“I didn’t hang around or grow up with other Asian kids,” he said. “Always with good old American kids.”

But even the best of friends weren’t above teasing him about his unfamiliar Thai name. Merritt remembers being called “Soup, Supa, Superman, Supermath, Supperman.” Just about anything but Supamith.

“Once kids got hold of my real name it was all over,” he said.

In 1986, Merritt decided to join the U.S. Air Force and to legally change his name to mark the occasion.

“I wanted a name that had a good feel or good pronunciation to it,” he said.

He chose Michael James, but kept Supamith in the middle to represent his Thai background.

“Michael James Supamith Merritt is someone totally different, and someone who is out to make a name and take on any challenges and climb any obstacles that stood in my way,” he said, explaining on his name’s distinctions.

Today, Merritt is as “proud to be an American” as he is to be a Thai. The self-proclaimed U.S. patriot has a wife, two sons, two daughters and a career at an international freight forwarding company, And the evidence that Merritt cherishes his Thai childhood and roots is in, ironically, his children’s names. They all carry Merritt’s biological father’s surname, Boonsalee. It was the wish of Merritt’s mother, he says, and he was glad to honor it.

“I am proud of who I am and who I have become in this life,” Merritt said. “Thai people are proud people. I hold that and take it with me through life. I take all the traits of being a Thai and the traits of being an American too.”

Q&A with Mike Merritt

Do you go by your given name or your American name?
By my American name. Nam (as in Vietnam) is considered a family name, nickname or play name, but not recorded on birth certificate.
Most Thais have a full or real name, we call it, used in a professional manner. Our real name is documented on the birth certificate.

Is there one you identify with over the other?
Yes, I prefer mostly my American name I have been using, but when I’m with my close members of my family, they mostly know me by Nam, and of course they know my real name or professional name.

I don’t like telling people I meet my Thai name of Nam. I want to change my new beginning and new life, which people might think it’s strange, but there’s a reason to everything, right?

I got teased a lot with my name growing up in schools, and it’s because people were ignorant and weren’t familiar with the different culture background. It was hard to explain to people, and I got tired of explaining all the time.

Why did you legally change your name?
When I joined the U.S. Air Force to make it easier, and I wanted a name (Michael James) that had a good feel or good pronunciation to it. I wanted to be an architect, and I had to have a name that was catching to the eyes and ears. I put a lot of thought into finally deciding Michael James would be it.

There were several reasons for changing my name, and I don’t have any remorse or bad feeling about it at all. My name had always ended up on the girls’ roster all the time in school, even mail came in as “Mrs.” I had to run down to the attendance office and get it straightened out every year. Yeah, it got old, fast.
Kids my ages at the time made fun and didn’t pronounce it right. Kids thought I was odd or weird with my name, and it was hard to get accepted and there was a lot of peer pressure as well, just trying to fit in with the society and everyday American kids. I wanted to feel like an American, because I believed and loved its history, and all the traditions it all stood for. You can say I am Americanized, and fell in love with her, U.S.A.

How did that decision inform your cultural identity?
Well, people still see me and know that I’m Asian. Yes, I’m proud that I’m Thai, but also proud to be an American and be patriotic to U.S.A. That’s why I served eight years for my country proudly.

I’ve forgotten quite a bit of my ethnic Thai culture, but still hold some of the significant traits deep down inside. I respect it and will cherish it as well, because it’s my mother. I am proud of who I am and who I have become in this life. Thai people are proud people and I hold that and take it with me through life.

My cultural background of being a Thai person doesn’t really make me any different from anyone, because I’ve adjusted to my life as an Asian-American. I love the Thai food. That, I can’t let go, but I also grew up on grits, corn, potatoes and beans.

This piece is part of Behind the name, a series that explores second-generation American identities from different cultural perspectives. Click here to read more stories of others who are reconciling their ethnic, given identities with their American ones.